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Sunday, April 27, 2014

Human Beings and Their Activities, "The End of a Wonderful Life", Lynn Cohen


I'm sad today. We went to visit my aunt and uncle. Mimi fell a month ago and broke her hip. Surgery was successful. However, due to her dementia and very advanced age she is unable to cope with the pain physical therapy causes or to do movement on her own. She is now bedridden and we do not know how much longer she will be alive. They are in their apartment in this assisted living complex, a hospital bed brought into the living room. She sleeps most of the time. Very efficient and nice caregivers come in around the clock to care for her needs. This was the scene as my husband and I sat and talked with my uncle today. We took him out for a walk, the day was sunny and bright, the sky blue and the clouds beautiful. We enjoyed the forest of trees around the grounds.
But we had to bring him back to his current situation and it is hard on him. On the whole family.

I took photos and drew from them when I got home. I used pencil to repeat the grid homework once more, but not sure I'll do it again. I also used Tom Bow brush pens, watercolor and black ink pen on this piece. My heart is heavy. We have been blessed to have these two my whole life. She is my mother's youngest sister, the only living of three sisters in her family.

Thanks for listening.

18 comments:

  1. This must be so heart wrenching for you Lynn! I am glad you are there so often to give him support. Your true to life sketches make me ache for all of you. Hugs!!!

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    1. Thank you Joan. We are doing the best we can. Most falls on their son and DIL who live in the same town. It helped me to process my feelings by drawing this.

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  2. lynn.. thanks for sharing this very intimate moment with us. i pray for your aunt's comfort and that God will ease her pain somehow. and i pray that you will all be strengthened in this time of difficulty. This is a beautiful sketch filled with love. Sending hugs and prayers for you all!

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    1. Thank you Elisa. I appreciate your kind words. She is kept out of pain with morphine and methadone.

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  3. I am in real tears as I read this, it is so sad, but so good of you to post it - this is a part of life (and death) that we have to accept and think about, not hide it away. I feel for your uncle and, as you say, the loss of his bride which is the part of his memory of how he thinks of her in moments when memories come back to him.
    Also, it is so emotional for me because it brings back the months last year when my darling daughter struggled for life with a brain tumour in the hospital bed that was supplied for her in a downstairs room. It is coming up to a year in a couple of months, but still as sad. It was such a difficult time and though it sounds bad to say it we were all so relieved for her when the end did come.
    Sorry for sharing this, but I hope you understand that I do feel for you and know how heart-wrenching it is for you. Tissues needed now.

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    1. Dear Jez, thank you for sharing with us the loss of your dear daughter. To outlive ones child I cannot even imagine that pain.
      My cousin asked me what he's going to feel when his mother dies, the first words out of my mouth were '"you will feel relief"! It was how I felt when I got over the shock of my own mothers death. Yes, this is not an easy time, but something we are all going to experience sometime with someone, a fact of life. Hugs to you dear one!

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  4. So sorry to read this Lynn, all your family can hope is that Aunt Mimi is as comfortable as possible. I'm sure your visit helped your Uncle and your sketches help you, they are very good btw.

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    1. Thanks Ann. They are making sure she is comfortable, we will continue to support my dear uncle and glad you liked my art here, yes it did help.

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  5. I am sadden for you Lynn. It takes courage to even take sketches at this sad time. Bless you. Time is in Gods hands.

    My family all but my brother and I are living. So have gone through so many heart aches waiting and watching and then the end . I know where it is all coming from.

    I will keep you in prayer and families. if we can just remember in time. They will be at a better place.

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    1. Thank you Carol, and I am sorry for your many losses of loved ones.

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  6. Lynn your sketches tell the story and it saddens me. I'm sending you and your family prayers and strength. The loss of those we love is heart-wrenching, I know. Thank you for sharing and ::hugs:: to you.

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  7. Lynn, I cannot but echo what everyone has said here so well. Thank you for sharing. Know that we are thinking of you. And that your loved ones are lucky to have you, and you them. There is nothing like a loving heart, and one who is unafraid to love, and see the good, and the bad, and the painful, and be present and with all of it.

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    1. Thanks Margaret. Much appreciated words.

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  8. A moving story to which your sketch adds bittersweet poignancy. Lovely to hear of your family's solidarity and closeness in this time of sadness.

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    1. Thanks, it's a close knit family! We are lucky!

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  9. This is so sad, Lynn. I'm glad you were able to get your uncle out for a little break. My dad has Alzheimer’s and it's just as hard on my mom, taking care of him, as it is on him. I'm sure your uncle needed that time, even if he couldn't be gone long.

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    1. Absolutely so. Hope your mom has those who help spell her from time to time. My mom lived with us with severe dementia for nearly two years before she died. It was so hard watching the mom I knew slip away little bits at a time. Being responsible daily is the hardest job ever! And heart wrenching. Hugs to you and your family!

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